I was on my way home today when I started to think about how many different creative endeavors I have attempted and not kept up. I almost started on a negative self-talk trip about how it’s because I’m lazy, not talented enough, not disciplined enough etc. but luckily I was able to practice some thought stopping techniques, take a breath and re-frame my thoughts. I then started thinking about how I’m always waiting to be inspired before doing something and how this might have contributed to my lack of follow through. The fact that I was able to successfully able to stop the negative self-talk was delightfully surprising.

There are a lot of factors that have contributed to being able to successfully use coping skills I know I have. One of those factors was that I had recently medicated with Eel River Organics Nectar pen. They’re my favorite cartridge because it’s the only cartridge I’ve found that feels like taking a  dab. This is partly because they are 100% nug run, meaning they do not use trim to make their extracts just buds, and partly because they have a higher CBD content than most THC dominant cartridges I’ve seen.  I was vaping a White Widow which allowed my body to relax and my mind to be calm. White Widow is a very balanced hybrid (for me) that helps with both physical and emotional symptoms. The higher CBD count in the Nectar pen increases the feeling of calm without impairing my judgement. It’s great. I feel so lucky I am in a state where I have access to this means of anxiety management. I have found something that works for me, something that not only allows me to function semi-normally but I’ve found something that truly speaks to my soul. I am eager to share information, learn everything I can and just spread the word to others because that is how we will change the world.

Music, Marijuana and Mirth

I was sitting and listening to Green Day’s “When I Come Around” and was blasted back to high school. I was filled with a sense of nostalgia and happiness, remembering how I listened to Dookie, Nimrod, and Insomniac on repeat, occasionally switching out to Led Zeppelin or the White Stripes. Those albums, full of memories and music were amazing stone cold sober. For me, one of the most beneficial aspects of marijuana is the amplification of feelings. I feel things very deeply in general so one would not think I would welcome an increase in intensity but with the right sativa it’s different. With the right sativa, my brain will attach itself to the positive feelings/memories.

Sativas are known for increasing euphoria,energy and creativity. On the flip side, if one has too much sativa one might experience paranoia and increased anxiety. It’s a trial and error process to figure out which strains work for you. If you’re just starting out, I suggest picking one symptom you want to reduce and picking strains that target that symptom. When I first started I wanted “something to make me laugh” and that’s exactly what I told the budtender at my first dispensary. Luckily, the person guided me in the right direction and thus began my love affair with Blue Dream.

I’ve come a long way since entering my first dispensary. I’ve learned to be more goofy and relaxed when not medicated but it was Blue Dream that showed me what that felt like and gave me a goal to aim for. Friends, board games, music and good food have also helped in furthering this ability.


I was sitting out on my neighbors porch the other night feeling very proud of myself. I was proud because I was sitting there being social instead of inside watching Firefly for the 10th time. Now, I know there’s nothing wrong with sitting inside and chillin’ with yourself for the evening but I also know myself and if it were up to me that’s all I’d ever do. It’s a struggle for me to choose to be social over being comfortable so that night I won.
One of the things that facilitates my ventures to the outside world is cannabis. I’m lucky enough to live in a place where cannabis use is not as demonized as other places. This allows me the luxury of showing off whatever new/novel/exceptionally tasty cannabis consumption method with people AND socialize at the same time. It’s lovely. It’s also not my only method of socializing. I DON’T always have to be medicating when socializing. I am also a big trivia fan so I am constantly asking people if they know x,y,or z. I’ve found that 95% of the time people respond with some trivia of their own. It’s a fun little ice breaker anyone can do.  Other times I do the typical “Oh your (article of clothing) is so cute! Where’d you get it?” even though I really don’t care about fashion. It is in these moments I am proud of myself because even though most of the population can do these things with ease I don’t. I’m working on it though.

Intersectionality and Representation

I recently went to Gaymerx, a gaming convention focused on LGBT issues. When I mentioned I was going two separate friends of mine had the same reaction “it seems so unnecessary.”  Did they say that in those exact words? No. One person wondered why “we need all these labels. We should all just be people.” The other stated that the Bay Area would be a place where something like that would be of such importance as to merit a conference.” Now, it’s true, maybe they meant no harm by their statements but that’s just it: those statements are harmful. They erase an important part of someone’s identity. Yes, we ARE all people but only certain identities have been represented in mainstream American media.

Studies have shown a higher use of marijuana among LGBT folk than their heterosexual counterparts. Unfortunately, there has not been much research into the factors that contribute to this phenomenon. However, we do know that being marginalized increases negative feelings like depression, helplessness, anxiety and anger.We also know marijuana is often used to cope with these negative feelings. All of these are facts we know and yet no one talks about them. When no one talks about things that are supposedly “acceptable”  because “we are all people” it shows we are not truly accepting of things changing the status quo. This is unacceptable. So, I encourage you, as proud marijuana users, to go ahead and talk about it. Be safe, be respectful but be out there to say “I use marijuana and I will not hide in the shadows.”

The Truth About Anxiety

“Anxiety is like a toddler: it won’t stop talking, always tells you you’re wrong and wakes you up at 3AM.”

I came across this quote somewhere on the internet and it resonated with me. Funny but true, right? Here’s the odd thing though: most people would prefer to deal with a toddler than their own anxiety. Why is that? Short (and one of many)answer: Toddlers are less scary because they are manageable. Whether through incentives,or consequences kids can learn. This is a familiar concept to us. Due to the epidemic of silence surrounding mental health, anxiety has come to be seen as a sign of weakness.
Here is the truth: EVERYONE has some degree of anxiety in their lives.

A little anxiety is normal and can be adaptive. It may motivate us to work a little harder or warn us of impending danger. It’s how our ancestors survived. Problematic anxiety makes problems where there are none,sees threats in safe places and is generally a pain in the ass. Read that last sentence again except this time, replace the word Anxiety with your friends name. Would you let that person control your life? No? Then don’t let anxiety control your life.

When anxiety starts to negatively affect multiple areas of one’s life one must find a way to manage it. Everyone has a different approach when it comes to dealing with anxiety but one thing is universally true: The more tools at your disposal the better you’ll be able to manage the symptoms of anxiety (you know: the racing thoughts,obsessing over past mistakes, worrying about stuff that hasn’t happened, etc.).

Cannabis is just one tool at your disposal. Other tools include: meditation, thought stopping, going for a run, psychotropic medication,therapy, making art, talking to a friend, writing in a journal and so much more. Pick one, practice it, be patient with yourself. One tool not working? Try another. You wouldn’t try to paint a rainbow with only one color would you?

Redefining weed culture

I went to a Cheech and Chong show some years ago and they were funny as hell. One of the jokes went something like “Weed is one of the few drugs I can think of where, when someone passes you some your first instinct is to give it away when you’re done taking your hit.”   This is exactly what I love about weed culture. The term may be off putting to some, and I agree, it does generally does connote a less than desirable image. However, it’s a succinct way for me to describe what I feel is an aura of general positivity,acceptance, and generosity of stoners.

The stoner circle is a stereotypical image for a reason. Think about all the stoner circles on screen: they’re filled with relaxed, happy people,enjoying time together. We relish the chance to hang out with friends in a comfortable,non-judgemental environment. There’s opportunity to socialize but it is not a requirement of the stoner circle. There are no requirements in the stoner circle. This is my weed culture.

As Dave Chappelle noted in Half Baked  “everybody has their own little ritual when it comes to smokin'”. For me, these rituals are a great example of how, in weed culture, we have a sense of community that unites us and are still accepted for our own uniqueness. Yes, there may be playful teasing about differences in rituals but there’s no rejection based on your preferences. This is my weed culture.

I view it as my duty,as a conscientious stoner, to let those outside the weed culture know:Stoners are productive people. Stoners are kind people. Stoners are normal people, not a stereotype.



Welcome to an open, honest space where you are free to learn about the potential uses of marijuana. Enjoy and feel free to contribute through comments. Have a great day!